May 24, 2013

The Not-So-Great Things

Day 24: Your top 3 worst traits

We're all works in progress, yet sometimes it's hard to own up to our shortcomings. I certainly don't think I'm perfect, but it can be difficult to clearly see what our faults are. Hopefully we have some insight into our character, and we can try to see the areas that could use some improvement. Here's what I've learned so far:

1. I like to control things and for things to be done my way.
I know, I know. I'm a bit of a control freak. I have gotten much better with this, in part due to the life philosophy I've cultivated in my adulthood that reminds me that I cannot control everything, so accept that fact and move on. Even so, I can turn into a bit of a ball of high-anxiety when it comes to things like leaving our cat in the care of a friend or letting the hubs paint the living room while I'm away. I know that things will most likely be okay, but I would feel much better if I could supervise everything to make sure nothing is overlooked. I know how I like things done!

2. I get incredibly shy at inopportune times. 
When the hubs and I were traveling around South America years ago, I often was overcome with shyness/social anxiety and was so nervous about asking questions (to waiters, to bus ticket agents, to our hosts) in Spanish that I made the hubs do it for me. The problem? He didn't speak any Spanish, and I did. Oops! This, of course, drove him crazy since his language skills were so limited, and it would have been far more effective for me to do the talking. The hubs has gotten better with pushing me through these episodes and reminds me that I'm being ridiculous (in a nice way!), but I admit that my shyness still pops up from time to time.

3. I can be a bit moralistic and rigid with my standards.
Overall, I think I am a very accepting person, but from time to time I feel absolutely incensed when someone I love fails to live up to the expectation I have of them. This is very unfair of me, because oftentimes the expectation is superhuman or unfair to begin with, yet I still get so upset about it. When the hubs was trying to quit smoking in college, I would throw a fit if I would find him with a cigarette. The poor guy was trying so hard, and all I could see was the negative! This is without a doubt my very worst trait, and it's one I'm ashamed of. It's something I am very aware of and constantly working to improve, but unfortunately it still pops its head up every now and again. Again, I embrace our humanness and imperfection, but part of my own imperfection is that awful judgment. Thankfully this isn't one of my main characteristics, or I would be miserable!

Since I believe in balance and don't want to ruminate on my flaws, I'd like to end with three things I think are pretty great about myself! :D

1. I have a sense of humor.
Even when picking out my worst traits, I can laugh at them and love myself, anyway. If you can't laugh at yourself, what's the point? No matter how bad things can be sometimes, there is usually a laugh just around the corner.

2. I am capable of embracing love. 
My friends and family are so important to me, and I love them dearly. I like to let others know that they matter, and I enjoy expressing my love through acts of kindness or a nice word.

3. I am my own person.
I'm a quirky gal, and though I might not always be cool, I still love who I am. I don't mean this in the aggressive if-you-don't-like-me-go-jump-in-a-lake sense. It's impossible to be everyone's cup of tea, and that's okay. I just mean that I genuinely like who I am as a person. I love my life, and even though I could be better in some areas, I like being me. :)

Hurrah!

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